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Every individual has a different perception on what Home is ,based on experiences from childhood and a lot of parental influences . In this project Immaculata Abba talks on her perception of home and uses visual representations to show us exactly what her experiences feel like. See what Immaculata thinks of “Home”-
This series is inspired by a lot of my experiences in the past year which confirmed that Home, at least for me, is not a place. I struggled for the longest time with the idea that I did not and still do not feel at home in any place. It was a crippling struggle that often made me feel like there was no place for me in the world, like the world was one amorphous black mass of suffocating substance that kept trying to squeeze unwanted me out of its system. This struggle with my sense of belonging in this world eventually infected my personal relationships with fear and doubt and I learnt enough about fear and how it seeps into and mars everything you touch. It was then that I found that the feeling that came with instability in my personal relationships was an even worse feeling than placeless-ness. Loneliness is terrifying. With company, at least if I do not belong anywhere and I had someone else to share in that feeling of non-belonging, I could survive.
I started to see that my deepest feelings of safety and security relied on the people whose love I carried with me. Home then took assured form in the little pockets of kindness, warmth, and comfort I was getting from people. I was at home wherever there was love served to me, and in whoever was serving the love at that time. I also quickly learnt that a person who serves me love today may not serve me love tomorrow and that does not make them a better or worse person. All it means is that at ‘x’ time, in ‘y’ place, with ‘z’ person, I was at home. That Home is not made with bricks, but instead moves and shapeshifts. That Home is an essence often housed in buildings, or better still, in bodies.
I often think of the many ways expressing our thoughts about things would help us understand them and so I decided to visualise and explore this my new understanding of Home. In working on this series, I have come to better understand my own feelings of Home: that it is also open, light, touches you softly, holds you, is not afraid of looking at you, and makes you beautiful.